Let’s Talk About the Vasectomy

Shooting blanks after a vasectomy

The “V” word. I’m not talking about vulvas or vaginas but vasectomies. Here’s the gist of this story, I had one and I’m shooting blanks. My ejaculate no longer has “swimmers.” I’ve surgically modified my body so that I would no longer be able to impregnate my partner (or others).

I snipped myself for many reasons but the big one is that I love kids and I love my partner. I’m a yin-yang guy that is both pro-choice and pro-life at the same time. I believe that a wanted baby is the right baby, and I also feel terrible when a woman has to decide what to do with an unwanted pregnancy — considering a man put that baby in her belly!

My decision was born out of compassion, self-agency over my reproductive rights, my family life, and sexy fluid bonding time.

Making my choice wasn’t easy but the benefits are immeasurable!

How it started

After the birth of our second child, my partner and I had a long discussion about birth control and family planning. We decided that we’re done having kids. We were in our 30’s at the time and having two kids seemed like a good number to have.

…I got a “no swimmer” report…

So we’re done having kids but we like that activity that makes babies. How were we going to stop unwanted pregnancies because both of us are insanely fertile.

I remember the once unprotected session we had that created my son and the marathon sessions that created my daughter. We had been using condoms before my partner’s pregnancy but loved fluid bonding (aka unprotected sex).

We wanted to remain fluid bonded and the simplest and non-invasive way to remain that way was for me to get a vasectomy.

I scheduled a time with a urologist, discussed the topic at hand, and then ended up in an operating room.

While I will spare you gory details, it went quickly and I was able to walk out after the surgery. Granted, there was a lot of discomfort for a few days and I had to refrain from any sexual activity for a few weeks, but it was a small price to pay in the long run.

I’m pro-life in the sense that wanted babies are the best…

After my healing time was over and I got a “no swimmer” report, we were good to get back to the business of fluid bonding.

Why a vasectomy?

I’m pro-choice for you. I believe every woman should have complete autonomy over her body just as I expect that autonomy for myself. Your medical business is your business.

However, I am pro-life. I’m pro-life in the sense that wanted babies are the best. Unwanted pregnancies are painful. It’s painful for the woman.

I could never imagine what a woman has to go through when deciding what to do with an unwanted pregnancy. I can’t imagine her dealing with all the noise in the media today as she tries to navigate to a decision.

It’s something that I never wanted a lover to face and it’s why I’ve always used birth control. I didn’t expect my lover to take care of all the birth control, I took care of that. I didn’t want her to face this type of decision. It’s not the right thing to do. Plus, I wasn’t ready at that time to be a father.

Too often we men expect the woman to be responsible for birth control because she’s the one that gets pregnant. That is a wrong and dangerous way of thinking.

We men often forget how powerful our sperm is.

It takes two to make a baby, you are 50% of the equation, so what better way to take your reproductive health in your hands and bring birth control to the table. Condoms work just fine, provided they’re properly worn and used.

Nature is a funny thing, she gives us raging hormones and bad decision-making abilities (sometimes) to ensure that humans keep having babies.

Look, I get it. Pregnancies happen.

Almost every female friend that opened up to me told me about pregnancy scares, miscarriages, and even having an abortion at some point in their life.

And how did the women get to this state? There was a man somewhere in that equation and his sperm.

No sperm, no pregnancy.

The power of sperm

Look, I’m not saying to men not to have sex. What I’m saying is that we men need to take our reproductive health into our hands.

We men often forget how powerful our sperm is. Yes, women grow life in their womb but they can’t do it without your sperm. That’s a tremendous power, your seed can set in motion the creation of life itself.

This is why it’s so important for us men to take our reproductive health seriously.

Do the women in your life a favor. Don’t put her in a position to make a difficult choice. Be a better partner, lover, or FWB by being responsible for your own reproductive health.

You don’t have to get a vasectomy but at least wrap that rascal if you’re not ready to spawn your demon seed into the world.

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